A letter to the partners in crime err fangirling.

A letter to my adorbs unnirs. A letter to the fangirls who I love being with. A letter to the people who drag me into pretty much every single fandom they're in, yep.

To my unnirs~  
          Hello hello hello~ heh~
          You might be wondering why I typed this as a single message so I'll state the reason. It's because I'm afraid I might just say the same things to both of you, just with different words. I actually see you as partners-in-crimefangirling so please bare with me. Heh~ 
          Unnies, thank you thank you so much for all the time you've given me. Thank you for all the time you've spent with me. Thank you for letting me get to know you. Thank you because you're always there for me, might it be about fangirling, which we do most of the time, or just me being a drama queen lol Thank you because, even if I'm overly annoying, you never ignored me and my inner fangirl. Thank you because you never left. Thank you for just about everything you've done for me. 
          I'm so sorry for not being a very great dongsaeng. I'm very random but at the same time socially awkward so there are times I couldn't respond correctly to you. Sorry if I can't keep up with you and your way of fangirling when we're together. Sorry because I'm the quiet type of fan. Sorry if I have done other things that I am not aware of but might have had you upset. I promise to go to DKFC2, though. Unless of course SNSD's freaking coming I need to see my gurls. lol
          One day, I'd definitely know everyone from BToB, BAP, and all of the other Kgroups which name starts with 'B' loljk.
          I wanted to make this longer but I guess I couldn't right now. I'm fangirling okay, I mean, I'm listening to Dongwoo's rap in Destiny. Heh~ You don't know how much I love that guy omg. 
          Unnies, thank you for everything. Happy Merry Christmas! God bless! Take care~ May you have a greater fangirl year in 2014. I love you both to the moon and back. :*
-Besh ♥

It's quite a loss that Melody unnir won't be able to see this this Christmas /cries.  
I would have also sent this to your house if I knew your address but then I don't so lol I'm also lazy so yea.
There are so many things to but the words couldn't come out right now. I'd definitely tell you through another message tho. :)
I wuv you guys mwa mwa

A message to the person who means a lot to me.

A message to the person who I'm very thankful I got the chance to meet. A message to the person who I want to personally meet. A message to the person I admire.

Hi Airlea nee-chan!

          How do I start this? lol.
          Nee-chan! How have you been? I'm so sorry I don't reply to your messages faster TT____TT I don't open my facebook that much anymore. I only check the notifications and such. Most people are complaining about my posts so I partially left. Hahaha.
          Nee-chan~ I just want to tell you that I am very happy to have met you. The first time I added you on facebook, you already saw my dramatic side but, even still, you never left. I am very thankful for that. I truly am. If I could just show you how thankful I am for meeting you, I definitely would.
          Thank you so much for everything you've done for me. Thank you for all the effort and time you've given to me. Thank you because your words of encouragement help me through painful times. Thank you because you're you, nee-chan. You might go and say that you've actually done not quite a lot but for me, who's always sad and upset, your words mean quite a lot. All the things you've done for me will never be forgotten.
          Sorry, too, nee-chan, if I ever made you sad or upset. Sorry if I don't talk to you as much as I did before. Sorry because it seems like I only talk to you when I'm in need. Sorry because it feels like I'm the only one who benefits here. I wish I could also know what things made you happy and made you sad so I could be there for you every single time. I'll always be here for you nee-chan, no matter what happens. 
          Airlea nee-chan, I am really glad to have met you. I am thankful that God made us meet even if just online. I do wish to meet you personally though, heh~ I just want to hug you tight and tell you how much I thank you and how much I love you. 
          Thank you so much for being part of my 2013 nee-chan. I hope you have a greater year this coming 2014! Merry Christmas. God bless you and your family. Take care always, ne? :) I love you nee-chan. Mwa mwa :* 

-Besh ♥

I would've sent this as a hand-written letter but I don't know your address so lol I'm too lazy this Christmas vacation too so. He he~ ♥ 

A letter to a certain dongsaeng.

A message to the girl who I will never ever forget. A dongsaeng who is always in my mind. A person who I will always love.

Hi Sarah~

          How have you been? We don't talk a lot anymore. I kinda miss those random conversations with you! Hahaha. Did you know it's been more than two awesome years since we met online? It's just so...wow! Hahaha. Our long distance friendship is truly awesome don't you think? :)
          Anyway, thank you so much for just about everything! Thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for the things you've done for me. Thank you for being a great friend. Thank you because you never forgot. Thank you because you're such an angel. I am also deeply sorry for the bad things I've done to you, might I know of it or not. Sorry because I always forget to reply to some of your messages and won't remember it until after a month or so. Sorry if I've ever made you mad or upset. I'm sorry. I truly am.
          Sarah, you probably aren't allowed to see people who you've met on the internet (I know I am but kkk~) but I still wish the day would come that we would finally personally meet each other. I don't care if it takes three or five or ten or even fifty years, if I know I will be able to meet you then I'll wait. I know I sound like a person in love but these kinds of friendships which last for years are real treasures to me. I am not the friendly type of person and I don't get a lot of friends so I treasure each one I get. I just wanna hug you real tight and tell you a million thank-you's because I love you that much. He he~
          Well, what I really wanted to do is wish you a very Merry Christmas! I hope you and your family a great day and a greater next year! ♥ I love you. xoxo mwamwa :** Take care always okay? If you need me, just send a message. ♥

-Besh ♥

 I would've sent this through mail but lol I am totes lazy this Christmas vacation so yea. lol 

20 Kpop Questions~

1. Your favorite group(s)?

I support every group I know but here are my favorites:

Girls Generation/So Nyeo Shi Dae | Sistar | EXO | BTS

2. Your bias?

Taeyeon | Jessica | Tiffany | Sunny | Yuri | Hyoyeon | Sooyoung | Seohyun | YoonA
Bora | Hyorin | Dasom | Soyou 

Taemin | HyunA | Chanyeol | Dongwoo | Taecyeon | Jun.K | Min | Gayoon | Hyosung | Leeteuk | Siwon

it is quite acceptable to forget some okay

3. Your favorite song(s)?

snsd and sistar's song accept that

4. Do you ship? So yeah, which pairing(s)?

I know I shouldn't but I do:

YoonYul | JeTi | SunTae | BaekYeol

5. Have you ever gone to a concert?

Nope, sadly. Might be going to Dream Kpop Fantasy Concert 2 tho this 2014.

6. How long have you liked K-pop?

I tried so hard to stay away from Kpop but I've been a fan of SNSD since 2009. Kpop since 2011.

7. Favorite boyband?

EXO and BTS... sadly, lol just kidding. ♥

8. Favorite girlgroup?

SNSD and SISTAR 'til, well, forever.  ♥

9. SMtown or YG entertainment?

I'm a stan of SMEnt so SMTown.

10. How many K-pop songs do you have on your ipod/playlist?

I don't count but more or less a hundred and fifty.

11. Name 3 of your favorite songs sung by girlgroups. 

Wow, this is hard. 

Every snsd and sistar song I've heard so far are my faves okay it's hard everyone knows that.

currently my other faves are

Is It Poppin by 4Minute | Yoohoo by Secret | APink's Nonono

I love 2ne1's songs too btw.

12. Name 3 of your favorite songs sung by boybands.

what but prolly

Sorry Sorry Answer by Super Junior | I'm A Loner by CNBlue | Infinite's Destiny  

13. Are you taller or shorter than your bias?

why is this question here?

14. What's your favorite lyric?

i dont have okay

jk Gee gee gee gee baby baby baby 

15. Have you made fanart / written a fanfiction?

Nope. I suck at writing stories. I suck at drawing. You're making me sad. 

16. How much kpop merchandise do you have?

I think it should be how many but idk there's quite a lot. But I'm going to tell you that I've spent err my dad has spent more than 10000 pesos on my Kmerch. No, I'm not proud. I'm quite upset actually.

17. Do you have cons/meetings in your country, so yes, have you ever attended to one?

Yes, and yes. 

18. Eldest or maknae?

I like the eldest ones but lol maknaes are too cute not to love. They're all bias wreckers I hate them.

19. Whose birthday is close to yours?

Seohyun's. 

20. Do you watch k-drama? So yes, which one is your favorite?

No, I'm lazy.

An hour before Yeol's birthday.

Dear person I love,

11:00 pm KST

Hello hello hello hello how do you do? Hahahaha. Just kidding.

            I am writing err typing this right now because it’s only an hour, at least in KST, before your birthday my precious Yeol.

11:01 pm KST

Hello? How are you? I hope you are doing fine and are happy right now. I hope you are having a good rest as you have been very busy these past few days, weeks, months. I hope you are having fun with your members right now if you’re waiting for your special day. A lot of us are waiting for it. Some did a countdown for it.

                I am not sure of what to say but I guess I’ll just say whatever pops up in my mind.

                Yeol, I have not been a fan of your group for the longest time but know that I love everyone of you. I love your hyungs and saengs. I love you, all of you. I love you the most, though. It’s been and still is a fun journey having you as my favorite.

11:11 pm KST

                I wish for EXO to have a good life. I wish for EXO’s happiness. I hope Chanyeol will always be one of the reasons why EXO smiles.

11:12 pm KST

                I want to thank you. Thank you because you’ve made me experience new feelings. Thank you for I got to know and love EXO because of you. Thank you because your dimple is so cute. Hahaha. Thank you because, even though I have not met you before, you’re one of the reasons why I am still here, smiling and surviving every day. Thank you for making EXO members smile. Thank you for making your fans smile. Thank you for your lovely smile. Thank you for being you.

11:19 pm KST

                I hate you. I just do. I’m so ugh but I just wanted to say that. Hahahaha. I love you more though :)

11:20 pm KST

                 I wonder what you’re doing right now. Sleeping? Eating? Laughing? Singing a song? Playing the guitar? Oh, how I wish I was there by your side right now. How I wish I could greet you personally at midnight. How I wish I could see your cute face. How I wish I could make you smile. How I wish I could hand over a letter and a gift to you today.

11:24 pm KST

                Hmm…36 more minutes before your birthday…Yes, I am good at math /sort of/ because I need to.

11:25 pm KST

                Chanyeol? Is that your name?

11:26 pm KST

                I want to hug you right now. That’s all I want. But why am I wishing something that will only benefit me? It’s your birthday; you should be the one receiving. Hahahaha.

11:27 pm KST

                You know, even though I love you, I also want Dara to notice you. I don’t know what kind of love you have for her, but I hope you could interact more with each other. That would be so nice :)

11:29 pm KST

                Few more minutes ‘til your birthday; what kind of things will you be wishing for on your special day? Well, whatever they are, I hope you get them. I always do hope for your happiness. I will always do.

11:35 pm KST

                Lalalalalalala~ I hope Chanyeol would sing a song for me, too ^^

11:37 pm KST

                When Chanyeol smiles, sunshine~~ It’s true. I know other fans think like that, too. Hehehe~

11:40 pm KST

                20 more minutes; I’m here, patiently waiting for your special day. How old are you going to be tomorrow? Hahahaha. You’re getting older, when can I catch up to you?

11:42 pm KST

                Sometimes, I wish I was in South Korea. I want to see your face. Go to places you’ve gone to. See what things you buy. Look at you wherever you are. I might sound like a stalker, but I just want to see you.

11:45 pm KST

                Park Chanyeol! Do you know how much it hurts to love someone? Do you know how much it hurts that that someone is far away? Do you know how much it hurts to love someone who you have never seen before? Do you know how much it hurts to love someone who doesn’t even know you exist? I want you to know. I want you to know because that’s how I feel.

11:50 pm KST

                11 more minutes… I am getting so excited. I’m sure most of your fans are!

                Chanyeol oppa, I’m really going to write everything I want to write right now.

12:00 pm KST

Happy Birthday Park Chanyeol!!!

I voted for Girls' Generation's "I Got a Boy" to win Video of the Year a...

A Run for the Pasig River

Last 6^th of October, Sunday, a fun run was held around the Quezon Memorial Circle. We took the cab before 4:30 am. We arrived roughly at 4:50 am and had to walk from cluster 22 through cluster 7 due to the heavy traffic as early as that time in the morning and the cab can no longer take us to as far as the commonwealth avenue. This was a fun run so this was actually expected by others, though for some of us, it was quite surprising. I’ve never really had that kind of experience before as I have never been to such an event. I felt excited and at the same time nervous. What was the road to wherever going to be like? How will it be for me? What kind of experience will this be for me as a first-timer?

To be quite honest here, it really was annoying to wait and to think that it has started when it actually hasn’t. Anyway, the part where we were close to the “start” was very exciting. Why? First, we may run already. Second, I won’t be in a big crowd anymore.  When we passed the starting point, there was a really big crowd to the left. I learned that it was because of Kim Chiu and a guy I actually don’t know. They were celebrities and most people would normally be thrilled. I run off together with one of my friends since we weren’t as interested. We started off jogging and then ran just to keep up with our other classmates’ pace but alas we couldn’t. We let them go. We ran, then walked, then ran, then walked. When we were near the finish line, I felt happiness. I was really happy because it’s finished. I was happy because I did something productive.

My friend and I finished before eight in the morning. We looked for our other classmates but we couldn’t find them. We were tired and hungry but couldn’t really find somewhere to eat or at the very least, somewhere to sit. She went home while I went with another friend. We arrived at the SM North Edsa by means of walking knowing that waiting for a jeepney will lead to nothing. We ate and met up with few of our friends. We went to a game center to pass time. My friends and I went to my house to be able to rest and such. They went home before 4:30 pm.

All in all, it was a fun experience, tiring but really fun. I did enjoy the experience a lot. I hope I could participate in another event like this. I am really looking forward to helping again and being productive for our Ilog Pasig.

A very important day - forgotten

Last September 20th was the day we were going to perform our cheer dance which we have been practicing for more than 3 weeks. I showed up at the meeting place a few minutes after eight. Most arrived at nine in the morning. We started practicing after a while. We cut classes from Math to Chemistry to Math just so that we could improve the cheer dance, even at the last minute. So wecontinued practicing. I only have eaten bread since morning and I get upset and frustrated when I get hungry so I have been in a bad mood since we stopped practicing and went to school already. No one wanted to go with me and eat so that made me a lot more upset.We arrived at school at around 1:30 pm and prepared for everything we needed. We waited until past three for the start of the competition. We were third from the four sections to perform what we made. Everything finished at around 3:30pm and we were dismissed from 'class'. I was very tired from all the practice we had for more than 3 weeks. I thanked God because everything's over now. I headed home and arrived at past five I guess. Since we didn't have internet that time, I kind of just made myself more upset by connecting to the neighbor's very slow wifi connection. I slept after a few hours. Ah~ The practices are over. I wouldn't have to wake up early and skip meals and such. That day ended badly.
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Two days after that, still frustrated by not having internet at home, I suddenly remembered that it was Hyoyeon's birthday. I was like, 'it's already 22?!' and then wow, the depression I got for not remembering my favorite's seiyuu's birthday was so great that I didn't want to like Kpop anymore. YES, I FORGOT MY FAVORITE JPOP SINGER AND SEIYUU'S BIRTHDAY. IT WAS ON THE 20th OF SEPTEMBER AND I JUST HAD TO FORGET BECAUSE OF NO FOOD AND NO INTERNET. I hate it. I hate it so much.

Sometimes, don’t you just want to disappear?

This is a late blog post. We didn't have internet until a few days ago. Written on the 30th of July.
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Yesterday evening, 29^th of July, when my mom and dad arrived, they started fighting about a fcking television remote control. We couldn't find it but seriously? It’s JUST a remote controller. They started shouting at each other, and at me, too. My dad also woke up my younger sibling because he was the one who hid it.

As growing up, I never really heard my parents fight, and never did they shout at us like that. I never thought that this kind of thing was going to happen to our family. I wasn't used to being shouted at, and loud sounds irritate me.

I felt like my world was falling apart last night, I still do, at this hour, to be honest. I started crying, I cried for more than an hour or two. I couldn't stop. I was cursing, though I should not be doing so, and crying and I was wishing for me to be dead. I feel like this family would be happier without me, I always do. I have a lot of plans for their lives and mine, but I hate this, I’d rather be dead and feel nothing than cry every night feeling sorry for myself and having no one to tell these things to.

I love my family so much even if I’m not that close to them. They’re pretty much all I have for the rest of my life. I wish we could go back to being a happy family. I wish that happiness will overcome the sadness in this family. I hope we would start going to church together again. I just want to be back.

---------- # ---------- # ---------- # ---------- # ---------- # ---------- # ---------- # ---------- # ---------- 

Today, 30^th of July, I went to school, a bit late, to be honest. Mehehe~ I laughed at everything there was to laugh about. People around me were actually telling me to stop because I laughed too much. I just told them that I am problematic and I just want to laugh to hide what I was feeling. I wanted to talk about what happened yesterday, I wanted someone to listen to me, and comfort me if ever I cried, but I couldn't really. They know me as someone who is always happy and such. I always smile. I told what happened last night to a friend, though I wanted to detail it more, it’s too embarrassing. We’re not so close to tell my own problems and such. Ah~ But I really did laugh a lot. He-he~ It was fun, the pain was put away for a while, but now that there’s no internet here as I am typing this, It’s getting lonelier and lonelier. It’s getting hard for me to breathe as well. Someone save me. :( 

A letter to my ex-crush.

Dear ex-crush, 

How have you been? Loljk. I don't really care. I don't even remember how we used to talk, how we used to chat, how we used to laugh together. Good bye~ I've said so much to you already. But, thank you. Thank you for always being there for me, for being a friend. Thank you ^^

-Besh

When your internet friends are actually better than your personal friends.

Wow, I'm actually crying right now. My nee-chan is really kind. Tears of joy can't stop coming out of my eyes. hehe~ ; __ ; I'll be reading BL like right now. Just kidding. Gonna read something that will make me cry more because of jealousy: KIMI NI TODOKE. Hahahaha. Good Night ^^

A letter to a stranger.

Dear someone I do not know,

Was that harsh? lol sorry. Anyway, Good Day to you Ms./Mr. How are you? I hope you are doing well. I hope we meet soon. I hope to have lots of good conversations with you. Please do not do bad things to me. I wish you would be someone who will always be kind to everyone, well not everyone, but at least to most of the people here in this world. Have a great day~

-Besh

A month and a day.

It's already been a month and a day since I started going to college. It's pretty fun, but kind of annoying at times. My classmates err... block mates are nice, well, the girls at least. Most of my block mates are boys and sometimes what they do with our block mates and professors aren't too nice. But we do have a few laughs too ^^ AND the fact that I have to wake up early every morning annoys me even more. And two maths every Monday - Wednesday - Friday is even worse. Anyhow, my professors are good to us, thankfully. Hmm... what else? I'm growing sort of tired of having to travel to and fro school and my house, too. One hour for each is just tiring. When I get home, all I want to do is eat and sleep. Speaking of eating, we have our classes from 10:30 to around 3:30 or 4:30 and NO LUNCH. Good because I can save, bad because, well, we don't eat. And recently, I joined an anime club which is called "Anime Holics Organization" which will probably make me want to go to school more. Mehehe~ Ah~ I don't know what else. Good night. Hihi~

College.

So as I told you months before, I graduated from high school, thankfully, and now I'm going to college. College starts on the 13th of June and I'm pretty indifferent. I met some of my classmates last week due to the Math Enhancement Program we had. I'm thinking this is just going to be like suspension of class and it's going to be back this Thursday. The only difference is the professors, we had an incoming 2nd year college student as tutor so he was nice, I wonder about the professors we're going to have. Ahh~ I hope they're good. I hope. I'm not good in dealing with people who constantly get mad at the littlest things or those who never even smile because I smile a lot. Mehehehe~ I think I have to go to sleep. lol. Good Nytie~

I totally forgot something =.=

I forgot I was doing the 30 day challenge and I have to catch up. Going to start from where I left off and since I'm too lazeh to do that today, I'll start tomorrow. Mehehehe~

If my mom scolds me later, I'm gonna scream.

So, yesterday (it's already 1:48 am here) my cousin and her mom were here because her mom was a 'watcher' whatever they call it together with my mom and they had to watch voters and stuff. And my little cousin was left here. Her mom hasn't picked her up and since my cousin's still a small girl, she has to sleep earlier and she actually has to sleep, I lent her my bed. I LENT HER MY BED. It's actually quite a miracle I did that, I wouldn't even let my mom sleep there. But the kind-hearted person I am, that was a joke tho, I lent her my bed. I'm quite regretting it, but yeah, I have nowhere to sleep now. I have to not sleep. I-I can't take it anymore. ; A ; Someone help me ; A ;

A letter to my dreams.

Dear dreams I dream for the future,

I really hope you would all come true. I will do EVERYTHING for you to become true. I always hope for the better and I think you're the better. I want to fulfill every single one of my dreams because I know that not only I would be happy but my family, too. I know someday that the things I will do someday will make them proud of me and my achievements. But right nao, all I can do now is study and do my best. I will do that until every one of you will be fulfilled. I promise ♥

-Besh


Dear dreams I dream at night,

You know, no matter how scary or lovely you all are, I will always love every bit of you. Why? Because I know that I am not afraid to face reality after I see you. Of course, dreams that are lovely always will be the best, but you're also the reason why I get up and hope for a better sleep every night. Thank you for making everything else better. I love you my sweet illusions ♥

-Besh

A letter to my sibling

Dear sisturr,

You know, we almost always fight about every little thing, unless of course if it's about animu, but you know what? I will always love you. You and our brother, I will always love. You might not be the most perfect siblings but I will love you. Sisturr, thanks always for being there to make me laugh and being there when I make fun of something. A little bit of you makes everything funnier. Thanks to everything you've done for and to me. Thanks for always giving me what I want like you're my parent. lol. Sorry if I am not the best sister in the world, but know that I will be one of the good ones, tho not always. Haha. I don't have a lot to say but sorry and thank you. I love love love you so much :*

-Besh

A letter to my parents.

To my mama and papa,

First of all, thank you so much for all the love and support you've given me and my siblings. Thank you for all the things you give to me. Thank you for always being for us whenever we need you. Thank you because my siblings and I have had a wonderful time in this small world. Thank you for everything. Ma and Pa, I'm really sorry for all the bad things I've done before and I'm doing now. Sorry because I didn't listen. Sorry because I talked back. I'm a really lonely person inside and little things make me mad most of the time, so I'm sorry. But I want you to know that I love you both so much, tho I do not show it often. I don't have a lot to say, but thank you and I'm sorry and I love you so much

-Besh

A letter to my crush.

Dear crush,

You know, I've always liked you. But you are a really close friend. And it's only after you telling me you liked me that I admitted that to myself. I like you a lot. You were always there for me when I needed you. You were always there when I had a problem. You were always there whenever I was happy, sad, angry and every emotion I felt. I didn't want to end our friendship but I think, it's about time we did that. I just can't take anymore of the pain I get when I couldn't do anything with you. We both know I don't want a boy friend and I don't want commitment but the pain of not knowing you're mine kills me. I've never been like this, getting jealous, feeling this much pain. 'Why did it have to be you', I ask myself every so often. You know, it hurts a lot when I think about how you could flirt with other girls, be sweet to them whenever you want because you're not mine, I hate that the most. If we never liked each other, we would have been closer to each other, we would've been better friends. We would've shared laughs and tears together. We would've understood each other so well. But no, I had to ask you THAT one question and you had to answer it with regret. I was the one who's wrong for asking that, I know. I know I shouldn't have, but I am one hell of a curious cat and I really had to ask why did you tell me those pick-up lines, why did you do those cute, sweet, little things every time we talked. I wasn't used to that so I had to ask. Anyway, thank you for everything, thank you for your time, thank you for advice, thank you for your sweet thoughts, thank you, just thank you. And I'm sorry I wouldn't talk to you anymore, I feel like you don't want to either so I don't. I'm sorry for all the trouble I caused you, sorry for all the bad things I told you, I'm really sorry. But now I guess I'll have to say good bye. I hope you'd find the right girl for you, as I lay around here staring at my computer looking at my husbandos. Good luck in college and I hope we'd meet again someday. Good Bye and Good Luck.

-Besh

A letter to my best friend.

Dear imaginary best friend,

I know you're not real and I'm just pretending to have you but I'm really glad you're there for me always. Thank you so much for always being there for me. Thank you because you're always there when I need you. Thank you because I know you will always be there for you. Thank you so much for everything. I'm so sorry that I couldn't do anything to make you real. I'm sorry because even though I'm old enough to not believe in imaginary tales, I still have you. You're all I have right now. You're probably the only one I'll have forever. You won't leave me, will you? I love you so much my dear best friend. I hope you feel the same way to me.

-Besh

30 Day Letter Challenge

day 1 — your best friend

day 2 — your crush

day 3 — your parents

day 4 — your sibling (or closest relative)

day 5 — your dreams

day 6 — a stranger

day 7 — your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

day 8 — your favorite internet friend

day 9 — someone you wish you could meet

day 10 — someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

day 11 — a deceased person you wish you could talk to

day 12 — the person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

day 13 — someone you wish could forgive you

day 14 — someone you’ve drifted away from

day 15 — the person you miss the most

day 16 — someone that’s not in your state/country

day 17 — someone from your childhood

day 18 — the person that you wish you could be

day 19 — someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

day 20 — the one that broke your heart the hardest

day 21 — someone you judged by their first impression

day 22 — someone you want to give a second chance to

day 23 — the last person you kissed

day 24 — the person that gave you your favorite memory

day 25 — the person you know that is going through the worst of times

day 26 — the last person you made a pinky promise to

day 27 — the friendliest person you knew for only one day

day 28 — someone that changed your life

day 29 — the person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

day 30 — your reflection in the mirror

credits to the owner

I've been thinking a lot about you

For the person who recently told me that he like me, I've been thinking a lot about you. But you know what's hard, I couldn't tell you because you might think I'm going to return something, some sort of a relationship thing, but I'm really sorry, no, just no. You know that right? You're someone who's really close to me and I know you know a lot about me and how I respond to those kinds of things. You told me that you still wanted to be friends but you know that what I heard on the phone is something like "it hurts" or "please stop and accept me". There were doubts. I just know it. But if you're really choosing that then I am thankful and happy that you want to do that. Thank you so much.

A little too not over you

I've been thinking a hell lot about my liking to you. Well, a lot more ever since my closest guy friend told me he likes me. Did I ever really like you all this time? Did I really care for you again? Tho, I can still say that I still get butterflies in my stomach when you do cute things to me, or when you do things which weren't normal months ago. I still feel happy when you talk to me, y'know? But then again, it's not like before where simple things like seeing you in the hallway, or you staying next to me make me feel really tingly inside and couldn't care much about the other things around me. I've changed my feelings towards you, but let me tell you this: I'm still a little too not over you.